Tata Nano

News Flash! Pregnant SUV Gives Birth To Twins

Tata Nano Twins

It’s got a windshield, steering wheel, tires…what more could you want?

“Well, how about profitability?”

“Sorry man, at a starting price of around $2,000 they had to leave that out, along with the power windows.”

“So…I guess they must use mainly volunteer labor to build them?”

“Yeah, mostly.”

“Then how’s this going to become the ‘blueprint’ for the car of the future?”

“Well, it starts at the grassroots level…beginning with your local church. You see, everyone’s got to pitch in. Get on board, so to speak, and do some serious praying…”

“Come on, cut the crap. I’m serious. I mean it’s exactly the kind of thing we should be doing here. So why aren’t we?”

“That’s the multi-billion dollar question. For all that money we dumped into the GM/Chrysler black hole a few years ago, we could have bought around seven million of these Tata Nanos instead.”

“You’re kidding me!”

“Of course I am. After all, who would want seven million of these little fuel-efficient things running around, when you could pocket a worthless 17.4 billion dollar I.O.U. instead?”

“You’re sick.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right. Spend too much time trying to be logical I guess. Maybe I’ll give up math and take up drinking. I think that’s the formula the Romans used…”

Tata Nano Car

[This is a copy of a piece I posted a few years ago as Impulsive Writing (15)]

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Men! Who Needs Them?

impulsive-writing-13

While hoisting her car onto his tow truck he couldn’t help noticing the sticker on the back bumper. He smiled and looked down at his scraped, bruised, habitually greasy hands. He thought for a moment, then lowered the car back to the ground, unhooked it, neatly penned a brief note to the owner, taped it to the driver’s side window, then got back into his truck and drove away.

impulsive-writing-13_27

The note: “I just saw that bumper sticker on the back of your car and couldn’t agree more. Women are so much better at solving everyday problems than men. So, with that in mind, you’ll find all the tools and parts you will need to rebuild your transmission at the Magic Wand Auto Parts store in the WonderLand Mall (which is right next to the WavyHead Hair & Nails Salon). Best of luck, and have a nice day! Bart’s Towing & Auto Repair”

* * *

On his way back to the shop he stopped at a Goodwill store and bought a pink dress, some thongs, a pair of earrings, and a wig. He then drove to the shop, parked the tow truck, went into the office and tendered his resignation. When he got home he took a shower, changed into his new outfit, mixed a drink, sat down at his small kitchen table, opened the phone book, found the listing he was looking for, then dialed the number…

“WavyHead Hair & Nails Salon, how may I help you?”

What Is Life?

What is Life

What is Life?

Life is what you believe it to be,
Until you believe otherwise.

What is Love?

Love is what you feel it to be,
Until you feel otherwise.

What is Reality?

Reality is what you see it to be,
Until you see otherwise.

What is Death?

Death is what you think it will be,
Until you think no more.

* * *

Graphic Stimulation (28)

NEWS FLASH!

The President of the United States has just signed into law a new bill that for the first time legalizes human cloning. However there still remains one very contentious provision in the bill which requires all future clones to be produced with specified ‘behavioral’ strings attached. This provision was very strongly supported by left-leaning ‘Pinocchioists’ who favor complete governmental control over all aspects of the nation’s educational system.

(Note: Google “No Child Left Unstrung” to gain further insight into the controversy surrounding what is rapidly becoming known as the ‘Entanglement Provision’ of the nation’s provocative new human cloning law.)

* * *

The above is a comment I made in response to Picture It & Write by Ermilia